I need to get my thoughts in order about this, because they're very complex.
Number one, it simply doesn't feel real to me. I've been waiting for this day for eight years in a way that I hadn't waited twelve years for Clinton's.
The election of 2000 was horrible and heartbreaking. It's not about the long, drawn-out recount, or the way it was eventually decided, or whether or not it was stolen - while I believe it was, there is absolutely no way to prove it and it's not the reason for the heartbreak.
It's this - even in the year 2000, and before, the public perception of GWB was, well. Special. No one thought of him as terribly bright or involved. This is in contrast to Clinton, whom we know is brilliant, or GHWB, who everyone acknowledges as intelligent or, for that matter, Gore. No one thinks of Gore as less than bright. But we thought of GWB as, well, dumb. Not smart. We knew he'd failed at everything he tried before; we knew he skated by in school (and, yes, so did his next rival, Kerry, but this isn't about Kerry.)
It may not have been true, but that was the public perception of GWB. You can see that from the comic portrayals of the time - and comedy reflects opinion. It doesn't give it.
And that was what was heartbreaking - half of this country (or half of this country that voted) voted for the dumb guy, the guy they wanted to have a beer with, the guy they could party with, even if the guy had stopped drinking/partying himself. George the polititician, if you will. And I can't understand that.
This is not a party thing - there are and always have been brilliant Republicans and idiot Democrats. This is an anti-intellectual thing that is downright scary.
And since that day half this country voted for Bush, I've been worried about this country, and I've been waiting for someone else. In 2004, Kerry lost. But Katrina hasn't happened and the war was, well, not at the level of unpopularity it is now, although it was down there and the economy was floating on its bubble, and Bush the incumbent won.
McCain - I really don't doubt McCain's intelligence. I don't even doubt Palin's. And if he were being sworn in tomorrow, I wouldn't be happy, but I'd still be relieved that we had someone better.
But tomorrow isn't just about getting a new president, or an intelligent president or a Democratic president, although it is all of the above. Nor is just about getting an African-American president, although that is also a great and good thing. This is about Barack Obama himself.
I did NOT vote for him in the primary. I voted, proudly, for Hillary Clinton. I voted for her for a number of reasons. First and foremost, I truly believed she'd be a great president, and a better one. But also - I knew deep in my heart that Obama would win the primaries, and I would be able to vote for him at the general election, but this would be my first chance to vote for a possibly viable female candidate for president, and no way could I let this chance pass by.
And that's when I noticed how Clinton was treated - if she was calm and cool, she was called unemotional and robotic; when she cried, she was called weak or even opportunistic. She was held to a standard no male candidate was, and when she reached it, she was called "bitch" or there were suggestions that she and Obama go into a room together and only one leave (thank you SO much, Olberman.) And Obama said not one word about this - about how no one deserved such treatment.
And then there were the more rabid followers - people who said they'd vote for McCain rather than Clinton (you all heard about PUMAs after the primaries. There were people on the other side as stubborn.) People who went into Clinton supporter's livejournals (not mine, but friends of mine) to say awful things. This isn't hearsay - I've seen it.
What was the result, for me? I was polarized, too. And therefore, I was sad and depressed when this country nominated an African-American for president. And there was a time I wasn't all that sure I was going to vote top of the ticket - no way would I vote for a Republican - especially the McCain who emerged during his primaries, who was not the man I'd admired in 2000. But I was bitter and depressed and it took awhile to get over it. (However, I did predict that Clinton would be secretary of state, while everyone else was saying Veep or Health and Human Services. I thought both were too limiting for her.)
What did it for me, personally? When he spoke about using green energy to not only help the environment and make us more energy independent (both vital issues for me) but also to create jobs and help the economy. And I realized that this man *thought*, that this man understood how everything is related and works together - and *that* was the sort of person I wanted as president, that I'd happily vote *for* as president. (And the beautiful and real diversity of the Democratic party didn't hurt at all.) I was completely sold during the Democratic convention.
And then he won. He probably won the day the stock market crashed, although Palin didn't hurt him, nor did it hurt that GWB's approval was so very low, but he won and he won big. And this country elected, despite all worried and doubts, our first African American president, and that's important. What is also important is that we elected a brilliant, thoughtful man who considers his decisions before he makes them, who concedes mistakes, who is polite and respectful (for the most part. He needs to stop calling women "sweetie", other than his wife and daughters.)
So, tomorrow is a day I've been dreaming of, and a day that will harbinge change for our country, with a leader we can trust. And I'm afraid of having too high expectations, I'm afraid of hoping things will change overnight and knowing they won't. And it still doesn't feel real.
(And one day a woman will become president. And one day we might even elect a non-Christian, although that's a very distant dream.)
Number one, it simply doesn't feel real to me. I've been waiting for this day for eight years in a way that I hadn't waited twelve years for Clinton's.
The election of 2000 was horrible and heartbreaking. It's not about the long, drawn-out recount, or the way it was eventually decided, or whether or not it was stolen - while I believe it was, there is absolutely no way to prove it and it's not the reason for the heartbreak.
It's this - even in the year 2000, and before, the public perception of GWB was, well. Special. No one thought of him as terribly bright or involved. This is in contrast to Clinton, whom we know is brilliant, or GHWB, who everyone acknowledges as intelligent or, for that matter, Gore. No one thinks of Gore as less than bright. But we thought of GWB as, well, dumb. Not smart. We knew he'd failed at everything he tried before; we knew he skated by in school (and, yes, so did his next rival, Kerry, but this isn't about Kerry.)
It may not have been true, but that was the public perception of GWB. You can see that from the comic portrayals of the time - and comedy reflects opinion. It doesn't give it.
And that was what was heartbreaking - half of this country (or half of this country that voted) voted for the dumb guy, the guy they wanted to have a beer with, the guy they could party with, even if the guy had stopped drinking/partying himself. George the polititician, if you will. And I can't understand that.
This is not a party thing - there are and always have been brilliant Republicans and idiot Democrats. This is an anti-intellectual thing that is downright scary.
And since that day half this country voted for Bush, I've been worried about this country, and I've been waiting for someone else. In 2004, Kerry lost. But Katrina hasn't happened and the war was, well, not at the level of unpopularity it is now, although it was down there and the economy was floating on its bubble, and Bush the incumbent won.
McCain - I really don't doubt McCain's intelligence. I don't even doubt Palin's. And if he were being sworn in tomorrow, I wouldn't be happy, but I'd still be relieved that we had someone better.
But tomorrow isn't just about getting a new president, or an intelligent president or a Democratic president, although it is all of the above. Nor is just about getting an African-American president, although that is also a great and good thing. This is about Barack Obama himself.
I did NOT vote for him in the primary. I voted, proudly, for Hillary Clinton. I voted for her for a number of reasons. First and foremost, I truly believed she'd be a great president, and a better one. But also - I knew deep in my heart that Obama would win the primaries, and I would be able to vote for him at the general election, but this would be my first chance to vote for a possibly viable female candidate for president, and no way could I let this chance pass by.
And that's when I noticed how Clinton was treated - if she was calm and cool, she was called unemotional and robotic; when she cried, she was called weak or even opportunistic. She was held to a standard no male candidate was, and when she reached it, she was called "bitch" or there were suggestions that she and Obama go into a room together and only one leave (thank you SO much, Olberman.) And Obama said not one word about this - about how no one deserved such treatment.
And then there were the more rabid followers - people who said they'd vote for McCain rather than Clinton (you all heard about PUMAs after the primaries. There were people on the other side as stubborn.) People who went into Clinton supporter's livejournals (not mine, but friends of mine) to say awful things. This isn't hearsay - I've seen it.
What was the result, for me? I was polarized, too. And therefore, I was sad and depressed when this country nominated an African-American for president. And there was a time I wasn't all that sure I was going to vote top of the ticket - no way would I vote for a Republican - especially the McCain who emerged during his primaries, who was not the man I'd admired in 2000. But I was bitter and depressed and it took awhile to get over it. (However, I did predict that Clinton would be secretary of state, while everyone else was saying Veep or Health and Human Services. I thought both were too limiting for her.)
What did it for me, personally? When he spoke about using green energy to not only help the environment and make us more energy independent (both vital issues for me) but also to create jobs and help the economy. And I realized that this man *thought*, that this man understood how everything is related and works together - and *that* was the sort of person I wanted as president, that I'd happily vote *for* as president. (And the beautiful and real diversity of the Democratic party didn't hurt at all.) I was completely sold during the Democratic convention.
And then he won. He probably won the day the stock market crashed, although Palin didn't hurt him, nor did it hurt that GWB's approval was so very low, but he won and he won big. And this country elected, despite all worried and doubts, our first African American president, and that's important. What is also important is that we elected a brilliant, thoughtful man who considers his decisions before he makes them, who concedes mistakes, who is polite and respectful (for the most part. He needs to stop calling women "sweetie", other than his wife and daughters.)
So, tomorrow is a day I've been dreaming of, and a day that will harbinge change for our country, with a leader we can trust. And I'm afraid of having too high expectations, I'm afraid of hoping things will change overnight and knowing they won't. And it still doesn't feel real.
(And one day a woman will become president. And one day we might even elect a non-Christian, although that's a very distant dream.)
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2 comments:
I just want to go back to ignoring my government instead of being afraid of it.
I was a Hillary supporter, too, but was happy to vote for Obama when the time came. I'll never regret it because what other real choice was there? Hillary will be a great Secretary of State. But I would be dancing if it were her inauguration tomorrow. As it is, I'm pleased, but watchful, perhaps even wary. Especially after Gene Robinson's prayer was left off the HBO broadcast yesterday. Thanks, Team Obama. Meet the new boss.
While I have NOT seen anything to be worried about - he's made mistakes, and he's not as progressive as people want him to be, but that just makes him human, well.
We just voted for a man who is young, bright, charismatic and supremely ambitious. Such men bear watching no matter what. (Yes, that would also go for Bill Clinton and JFK.)
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